Thoughts

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I've been thinking too much lately. Thinking too much and keeping everything to myself. Either I'm mad, frustrated, sad, lonely even happy. I think too much and I don't know where it takes me. I'm feeling mellow and sensitive and down almost all the time, and despite trying not to dwell to much on it, I keep thinking and it made me feel more miserable. I don't know why, but recently I feel like I'm faking everything. Like I'm forcing myself to smile, and pushing myself to make small conversations. Sometimes I feel like this life isn't the only life I have, the only life I live. (Don't worry about me going crazy, because I am ^^) That I'm tired of living both, and wanted to start over a new one.
The proof? I have a lot of unfinished stuff in my laptop and to-do list. Even though I know that I haven't finished one, I started working on another stuff without thinking. It makes me thinking, makes me wonder what is it that is wrong me? Is it because I was feeling sick that I'm feeling down? Or is it because I've to carry a responsibility that I no longer wanted?
I keep thinking and thinking, and didn't speak a word about it towards another soul, But in the end, not the result comes to my rescue, but instead it left being more confuse than ever. >_<



Don't question my sanity, despite my post this time didn't make any sense. Thank you.

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