Gomen nasai

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I'm away from home. Really far away. Almost three hours of flight away. Flight, not drive. Booking a flight ticket isn't the same as putting gas into your car and driving to wherever you want to go. But sometimes I wish it's as easy as that. That I can go home anytime I'm free, without having to worry about expenses and what-not.

Yes, last night was the last straw. Last night was the time for me to go really crazy, time for me to let go of everything inside me. Around 12am this morning, I dragged few of my housemates, and a couple of guy friends with me to the beach. 

I know, midnight, beach, no one else. But I like listening to the waves, it soothes me. Plus driving around at night is also another way for me to release my stress. Sometimes, in the middle of the night when I'm stressed I will drive around without destination. If I'm somewhere I'm familiar with, I'll go to the beach myself. If not, I'll just drive round and round, paying little attention to the gas :D

Last night I was raving and talking almost non-stop. I talked and talked and talked and hit a wall. I hit the sand. I had a crazy urge to ask the random guys parked near us for a meaningless fight. I was homesick, I was crying before I left home, but after some talking I was feeling mad instead. I seriously don't know what the hell was wrong with me last night.

I guess one thing after another is not doing good to me. Maybe I'm a little bit way too stressed, and I kinda sucked in handling things like this. 

Lucky me, I have those guys (and girls :) )to accompany me last night. 


Thank you, Tina, Huda, Aswad, Masad for last night. Thank you Fauziah, Aziza, Farah for putting up with me. Thank you for taking me in. Sorry I sucked in saying sorry, sorry that I can be a poker face when I'm supposed to look honest, sorry that most of the times my words are affecting and hurting you guys.

Sorry.


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