Poker face.

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Honestly? I think not. I think that whatever I feel shows up immediately on my face. And I've had people who told me off because of it.

Really, it's either that, or I'll say it out loud. I tend to express my displeasure, my dislike and hatred towards anyone and anything. Like I've said in the previous entry, being brutally honest. I'm not saying it's a good thing, it's generally the reason why I don't have that many friends. Normal people are usually intimidated by loud people, for fear of being told off. In my case, I don't mind when people told me off, because I do it shamelessly. 

Why poker face? You see, I'm extremely great at pretending. Pretending that it never happens, pretending that you don't exist. Yes, I can do that. Usually when it's something or someone that I hate, I can ignore them completely.

When I don't even know what I've done, but you decided not to talk to me, yeah, I'll do the same. I may be ranting about it to someone, depending on how close you are to me. But always, if you don't talk to me, and you didn't tell me about what I've done wrong, I'll assume that you no longer want to be friends with me, and I'll just pretend that we're strangers.

It's easier that way. In life, people come and go all the time. I don't have time to beg for a certain someone to stay in my life, when you no longer need me around, and when I know I have nothing to lose. What do I get by forcing you to stay? How can we be friends when the feelings are not mutual?

Yes, I may sound ungrateful to the lot of you, what's with all the memories (blah, blah, blah) and times we have spent together. Really, I don't give a damn on the past. The past is there only to teach me life lessons, not something that I should be mourning upon. While I can't help but missed those moments sometimes, I try not to wallow in the misery of it being gone. Who am I to go against fate?



p/s This is coming from someone that only moved on over something stupid after almost seven years. Oh, the irony.

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