a Life's Story

I'm going to cry. I thought I won't ever cross your path again. I thought you'll only be a history, a memory. But no, I was wrong. You come back and hurt me, without knowing it. Nobody knows, truthfully. But I can't help from reliving those times. It was a long time ago, I thought I was over it. I thought by drowning myself in Jpop fandoms will make me forget. I thought that by obsessing myself over Yuto, I'll forget that. I thought that, if I'm close with another guy, I won't remember anymore. I never know I'm this weak when it comes to things like this *sigh* Just when I thought I was strong enough, I was proved wrong. I even cried. I even got into funny mood swings. I... I'm lost. I don't know what else to do. I can't help myself, like how I used to do everytime I'm in trouble. I'm crying now. I'm no longer coherent

If I never said this to you before, please, I'm sorry I'm violent. I speak harshly, and acted nothing like a girl. This time, I won't blame the fact that guys are best friend anymore. But if this hurt you, eventually, tell me straight. Like when I criticize your fashion sense, and you hate it, tell me straight about it. I'll bear in mind not to say it again. So, in a huge return (I know) don't hate me if you don't tell me what is it about me that makes you really mad. Because even though sometimes I know what's on your mind straight away, (even if we just met/ never see each other face-to-face) I can be a dumb who can't understand/ feel the atmosphere, despite it being obvious to others. I'm just a human who loves perfection, so I'm always able to find excuses in everything I do, just to make it appear perfect. But it doesn't mean that I didn't think carefully about what you have said, I'm sorry but I have a huge ego that preve

How long has it been since I last updated? Almost half a year. Or maybe even more ^^; I've been lurking in LJ for too long, now I noticed it. Forget too long, I've been at LJ everytime I'm awake LOL There's a lot to catch up after all ^^